On a stormy February 13 evening several years ago, my husband asked me what I wanted for a Valentine’s gift.
Without hesitating, I replied, “A homemade card.”
I knew the request was simple and easy-the thoughtful gift to request.
“What do you want?” I asked. Facing a busy day and I secretly hoped he’d ask for a big, wet kiss that would melt him at the knees.
“I’d like a homemade red velvet cake,” he replied.
“Delivered to work?” I volunteered.
“That would be great!”
My mind began racing. How am I going to finish up all my projects, run errands and still find time to bake and deliver a cake? I’d never baked a red velvet cake, but I knew I couldn’t let him down.
I set the alarm early and began researching recipes for red velvet cakes before the sun crested the horizon. By mid-morning, I slid the cake pans into the oven. A glance at the clock revealed everything was on track for a noon delivery.
Twenty minutes later my two nine-inch round cakes looked like rolling hills. I turned to icing to save me. With every brush stroke, the cake tore apart and slowly transformed into a pinkish glob of goo. Then the icing ran out.
I grabbed the cake, a butter knife and headed back to the grocery store where I found even more people like myself (okay, not quite like myself) running around buying last-minute Valentine’s gifts. I purchased another double-container of icing, and opted for a red-helium balloon and a card just in case the cake couldn’t be saved.
On the way to my husband’s office, the helium balloon began rubbing up and down on the side of my head creating static. As many times as I tried to bat it away, the balloon returned. For the safety of everyone on the road, I gave into its annoying presence.
I arrived at my husband’s workplace looking like I’d pressed my finger into an electric switch. With no time to lose, I iced the pink glob in the trunk of the car, hastily filled out a card with an endearing message using a pen I found underneath the car seat, and patted down my ridiculous looking hair. I took a deep breath, plastered on a smile, and walked into my husband’s office with gifts in hand.
Only he wasn’t there.
Happy stinkin’ Valentine’s Day.
He was tied up in an unscheduled meeting for the afternoon. All I could think was, “Is he going to notice just how much icing is on this cake?”
Afraid he might not feel loved post-cake fiasco, I printed out heart-shaped love notes and placed them every stair between the entryway and our second floor so he would see them when he came home.
But he had to work late.
By the time he got home, we had experienced a power outage. Walking up the stairs, he couldn’t see a single note.
Meanwhile, despite the fresh tulips and cute store card my husband purchased, he kept apologizing to me because he hadn’t had time to fulfill my request for a homemade card.
We sat on the couch in the dark on Valentine’s Day and found out something new about each other: neither of us really cared a whole lot about the holiday. He purchased flowers and cards so I would feel loved, and I became a crazed baker with frizzy hair to express my love.
What we discovered that night is that both of us already felt thoroughly and sufficiently loved because of the way we treat each other and live life together the other 364 days of the year.
A few weeks post-Valentines fiasco, I began reflecting on how much loving God and receiving the love of God isn’t reserved for holidays like Easter or Christmas or Valentines.
To put it in Valentine’s terms, God isn’t looking for balloons, flowers, and a cake on special occasions for us to express our love to him.
He is looking for a more intimate and involved relationship where the gifts we offer to him–words of thanks, songs of praise, acts of service, expressions of kindness, bragging on him to others, and more–fill each and every day.
On this Valentines, may you remember that when it comes to loving God the greatest gift you can give God is yourself–not just today but each and every day.
Maybe you’re single, divorced, or don’t get the attention you think you deserve. What if Valentine’s Day doesn’t turn out like you think: the cupcakes smudge, the love letter never arrives, flowers wilt.
This Valentine’s day, let’s practice a defiant joy that declares that the darkness cannot and will not win. Let’s fight back with joy. Will you join me?
We are having a “fancy” homemade dinner with our family so that our daughter-in-law doesn’t have to spend her 1st Valentine’s Day with out Brandon alone. We’ve got filets, shrimp cocktail and even a heart shaped ice cream cake…but most of all we will all be together…loving on one another. Fighting back with joy!
I love that so much, Tara. What a great idea! Praying for you guys.
Well it helps that I could laugh about your post on the fiasco of Valentine’s Day. Normally, we would go out to eat, but we are busy tonight with a Bible study, and tomorrow night with our church service. That we do these things together is really what love and marriage is about. I made a card for my husband. He always gets me flowers for holidays, because I love flowers! I never get tired of them. A smile, a hug, a kiss, and a card, that is what our Valentine’s Day will be about, oh and holding hands while we walk into the church for service that night.
My husband and I have been married for over 17 years and during most of our married life, we never really cared about/celebrated this Hallmark holiday. But 9 months ago, my husband left me. I am standing in faith for my marriage and believing God will bring restoration, but my heart breaks at the reality that this year I don’t even have the choice as to whether or not we will celebrate it together. So this year, I am fighting back with joy by having a GALentine’s Day celebration! Tonight, I am meeting a gal-friend for dinner at a fancy restaurant (because I have a coupon for a free shrimp cocktail AND a $25 gift card!) and tomorrow night, another gal-friend and I are ordering a pizza, cracking open a bottle of wine, and hanging out at my house. Thankful for the love of God expressed through good friends…
Four widows, one three weeks a widow, one 2 months a widow and one 8 months a widow and one several years into her journey, decided to be pro-active and joyful. We had afternoon tea at Angel Tea Room. We had a great time!!!
I love that– hope you ladies had a blast! Huge hug.
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