My writing career began almost 20 years ago as intern at Christian Retailing magazine in Lake Mary, Florida. College provided a diploma but little of what I needed to survive in the 9 to 5 or, more important, the 5 to 9 of life.
Thrust into the world of publishing, the job became my training ground, the editors my schoolmasters, the readers my biggest fans and critics.
Countless hours were consumed with proofing, fact-checking, and the less-than-glamorous photocopying. But I learned the most about writing—and life—from hundreds of interviews.
Some people were breathtaking in their insight and depth. Others felt flimsy and shallow.
A few interviews provided rich accounts, compelling details, shocking anecdotes. Many did not. The stories that followed felt flat, unengaging.
As a naïve twentysomething, I thought the issue was them. The people.
Then one day I realized the real issue was me.
A pattern began to emerge. Though some individuals were prone to being more reserved, tight-lipped, and only offering yes-no answers, with enough prodding and just the right nudge they—and their stories—opened like a spring lily.
Among those who remained withdrawn or closed, I had to persist until I found the right the question.
That’s when I discovered a principle that’s not just true in journalism but also in life:
If you ask the wrong question, you’ll get the wrong answer.
This plays out time and time again when we meet new people. Sometimes we’ll struggle to connect, to find common ground. One apt question changes everything—the atmosphere in the room, the kindredness of the conversation. The right question opens a portal to what can sometimes become a lifelong friendship.
You’ve probably experienced this.
But if you ask the wrong questions—those that don’t move the conversation forward or open the hatch of connection, we as humans can remain stymied, disconnected.
Perhaps this is nowhere more true than in our relationship with God.
Sometimes we ask God questions that don’t press us forward in our faith, in our connectivity to the divine.
We want answers to questions we aren’t ready to hear.
We want answers to questions God isn’t ready to provide.
We want answers to questions that will only be resolved or make sense when we cross the threshold of heaven.
Perhaps, in order to lay hold of more joy, we need to begin asking better questions of God.
Ones that propel of forward.
Ones that lead us deeper into the heart of Christ.
Ones that awaken us to the fierce love of God.
Maybe instead of asking “Why?”, we need to ask, “Who?”
Instead of circling the drain of “Why this happened?”, we need to press into the question of, “Who are you in this, God?”
These are daring questions to ask. But such brave questions will not just lead to deeper connection to God and answers that transform us—making us look just a little bit more like Jesus.
Today, as you fight back with joy, reflect on the questions you’re asking God. What are some new questions you can begin asking that will move you forward in your faith?
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