“Perrier with sprig of parsley, please.”
Ah yes, people think the life of an author is all glitz and glamor. They have no idea. The private jets. The Bentleys. The New York photo shoots. The summer house in France.
Oh wait, that’s someone else’s life.
Here’s a behind-the-scenes look of what it’s like to be a writer and 7 signs you’ve made it as an author:
1. You’re mentioned in a fan’s Christmas letter.
Last December, I received a Christmas card and letter from a couple we’d met. Star struck by the encounter, they included me in their holiday letter. Flattered indeed. They wrote:
“We got to meet Margaret Feinstein and her husband Layf.”
That’s how you know you made a lasting impression. Or at least my Jewish cousin did.
2. You receive enormous royalty checks.
It will be hard, but I’m going to try not to spend it all in one place.
3. People ask you to sign a book.
Wait, that’s not my book. The real test that you’ve made it is an author is when you just smile and sign it anyway. You’d be amazed at all the names I’ve signed.
4. People send you homemade theological quizzes.
Before I consider perusing your book, I need to know if you believe that Jesus was:
- a) a prophet
- b) a good teacher
- c) the Son of God
Before I consider perusing your quiz, I want to know why you didn’t supply option d) all the above. You flunk.
5. When you arrive at an event and the person greeting at the door asks you if you’re the caterer.
Yep. It’s as awkward as it sounds.
6. When you find your books in a .99 bargain bin at a Big Lots in rural Louisiana. After inquiring about whether they are priced incorrectly, the clerk says, “Pay whatever you want. We’re just tired of looking at them.”
That’s a sure sign of success.
7. When you arrive at an event and someone stops you backstage to tell you how much they loved your last worship album.
I know I am Carrie Underwood’s doppleganger, but really?
If you’re a writer, author, artist, pastor or business person, what are the signs you’ve really made it?