No one gets out of life unscathed.
This reminder arrived just yesterday in the news of a friend who discovered they’re in the fight of their life against a rare disease. The questions of why and what does the future hold penetrated our conversation.
I’ve been praying ever since. But the weight of the conversation still remains.
Heavy. Awkward. Uncomfortable.
I know they’re hurting. While I don’t know their pain, I know my own, and my heart is filled with compassionate ache for them.
Sooner or later all of us are thrust into situations where we struggle with an achy breaky heart with God.
The flood of emotions. The tension of hope and despair. The wonderment of why was this allowed and why didn’t God stop it. The swing between doubt and faith. The swirl of fear and trust. No wonder our hearts feel so achy-breaky before God.
For some, the weapon of choice is withdrawal. Like a fuzzy puppy, to crawl under the house and lick our wounds and let out a faint whine.
Others strap on the weapon of anger for size. They lash out and rip into anything and anyone who passes by.
And some just prefer digging a hole of denial. Maybe if they wait long enough, it will all go away.
Yet achy breaky hearts rarely heal on their own.
When we try to heal them ourselves we end up with infections. Scar tissue. Complications. Distortions of our understanding of God and others.
Perhaps that’s why God is adamant that we come to Him.
Wholly. Fully. Completely.
Bruised. Broken. Blistered.
God is our Holy Balm.
Healing. Restoring. Renewing. Bringing clarity to the confusion. Faith to override fears. Stillness to the chaos.
And the doctor’s office for the achy breaky heart is found in the Laments. Those dark, shadowy Psalms where you can say anything, even the most unspeakables, to God.
This simple practice is a way to let it rip with God. To bring yourself, your whole self, doubts, fears, angst, and all before Him. This is unedited, uncensored you before God seeking healing, honesty, and wholeness.
A few examples: Psalm 10, 13, 38, and 55.
Here’s how to write a lament:
1. Write a few sentences describing the achy-breaky place in your heart. Write what you’re feeling without filter, without judgment.
2. Write a few sentences elaborating on the problem and it’s implications.
3. Pause for a moment and ask how God wants to come to you in and through this. How is God revealing Himself in this painful ache.
4. Reword your problem and complaint through the lens of how God has revealed Himself.
5. Write a concluding statement of how you sense God is leading you. Include a word of praise.
6. Conclude with a declaration of your trust in God.
7. Such a simple practice can bring about restoration and healing as it clears the air with God and our innermost emotions, doubts, and fears.
Over the last few years, I’ve been discovering the importance of lament as a doorway to mourning. As I write in Fight Back With Joy, (and it may sound counterintuitive):
Joy waits in the morning and the mourning.
In order to walk in the fullness of joy, we must learn to mourn well.
My hope and prayer is that you will discover lament as a portal to healthy mourning and healing and allow the fullness of joy to blossom in your heart again.
To pre-order Fight Back with Joy 6-session DVD Bible study and receive a FREE joy necklace, click here. The book and Bible study release January 6.
What is the achy breaky place in your heart today? Will you consider writing a lament?
Overcome depression as you reignite your imagination for laughter and celebration through Margaret’s new book and Bible study, Fight Back With Joy: Regret Less. Celebrate More. Stare Down Your Greatest Fears. Click here to purchase your copy.
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Margaret, today we are headed to the oncologist with our 22 year old daughter to see if he will have any answers for us. And, we are almost completely broke and I have been scraping together enough cash for a little bit of gas and food for the week. Yet, there is peace and the tender arms of God wrapping around us. There is also a quiet joy that we get to walk this road together, and the truth that we are not alone. There is even hope for a bright and bigger future ahead of us.
Thanks for the perfect timing,
Alee
Alee, right now I am praying for you and your family. Praying for ZERO cancer cells in her body. ZERO complications. ZERO financial issues.
Huge hug, Margaret
Margaret, thank you so much for your prayers. My daughter’s blood counts were all normal today. Praise the Father. I am so overjoyed and overwhelmed with gratitude. She is only schedule one follow-up appointment two months from now. If everything is still normal at that time, then she will not need to be seen again.
Thank you once again for the encouragement this morning. I agree with you about the finances. Thank you.
Blessings,
Alee
I also needed this. Since my husband’s diagnosis of liver cancer (10 cm tumor) and my own diagnosis of low renal function, I think I have been in “fuzzy puppy mode”. Thank you for giving me a way to deal with what I have been feeling, and a glimmer of hope for the future. ~ Rosemary A.
Rosemary- Praying for you and your husband during this difficult season. Praying for ZERO at all levels and complete healing for you both. Huge hug.